BeN bLeDsoEs pLaYtOy 4EvA
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Posts: 886
(2/29/04 11:18 pm)
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101 ways to cure boredom
1. Wet bits of tissue and throw it at the ceiling.
2. Give your cat a mohawk.
3. Find a piece of your mom's favourite furniture (wooden), get something sharp (a compas is perfect) and stab it, making a collection of little holes.
4. Point these holes out to your mom.
5. Make her believe it's woodworm.
6. After giving your cat the mohawk treatment, climb a ladder and drop the cat, seeing if it lands on it's feet.
7. Repeat the process until failure.
8. Watch paint dry.
9. Sit in the garden and stare at the lawn. When asked what you're doing, reply "I'm watching the grass grow"
10. Go around the neighbour hood taking pictures of the ugliest people/objects you can find.
11. Make a collage.
12. Mail this collage to all of the people/owners of the ugly objects you took photographs off.
13. After doing this, emigrate.
14. Write a song about how much you hate someone.
15. Re-write Pheobe from Friend's "Smelly Cat" as "Stinky Dog"
16. Write a song parody. (Changing Avril Lavigne's "Complicated" to "Constipated" is well-advised)
17. Walk around and around your neighbourhood in circles for hours on end, alone.
18. After doing this, see if you can write a list of new things you noticed.
19. Sneak into your brother/sister's room and steal little things from there, one at a time.
20. Keep doing this.
21. See how long it takes before they notice their stuff has gone.
22. Invent a new disease.
23. Tell all of your friends about this disease
24. Tell them every last detail about the symptoms
24. Slowly get all of these symptoms, one at a time.
25. Dial random numbers on the telephone and ask for "Nigel"
26. When the caller replies "I think you've got the wrong number" laugh and screech "OH, NIGEL!!! You're such a joker!!"
27. Ignore all phone calls, and let the answer phone pick them up.
28. Call your best friend and slowly describe some symptoms that are troubling you.
29. Make sure they are symptoms of a well-known STD.
30. Ask them what they think is wrong.
31. When they reply, scream "Ohhhh, MOMMA!! I'M TOO YOUNG TO DIE!?!"
32. Go around your back yard, collecting snails.
33. Paint numbers on the snail's backs.
34. Race the snails.
35. Take bets on which one will win.
36. Write your own children's book, entitled "The Boy Who Sniffed Toilets"
37. On the first page, write "This story is a true story about a dear friend of mine..." And then put one of your closest friend's names.
38. Include their middle name, Hometown and Date of Birth.
39. Get the book published.
40. Watch every episode of your least-favourite TV show.
41. Watch them repeatedly until you can quote the script.
42. Inform your parents that this is your new favourite TV show and get them to buy you merchandise.
43. When they buy you the stuff, glare at it and go "What dya buy me this crap for?!?! You KNOW I hate ________!!!!"
44. Find a really really old and crappy CD and play it over and over. (Spice Girls recommended)
45. Loudly.
46. When anyone questions this, yell "WHAT?! THE SPICE GIRLS ROCK!!"
47. Show signs of schizophrenia.
48. Give your schitzophrenic side a name, preferably Sasha. (even if you're male)
49. Give Sasha a background, including family members, pets, hair colour, eye colour, and how many moles she has.
50. Take bets on who would win in a fight.
51. Tell everyone betting how much of a badass Sasha is so they bet on her.
52. Make Sasha lose
53. Clean your room.
54. Mess it up.
55. Clean it again.
56. Tell everyone your favourite band is now *N Sync and inform them all that you are going to marry JC.
57. When they laugh, thinking you're joking, give them a funny look and say 'Uhh..why are you laughing? The date's already set.'
58. Have a stupid fight with all of your friends over which McFlurry topping is the best.
59. Storm off from this fight, yelling 'I can't hang out with people who like Crunchie McFlurry's!'
60. Ask your mother to buy you a domain online.
61. When she asks why, say 'I don't wanna use it. I just wanna look at it.' or 'It's just one of those things you HAVE to have!'
62. Go around, stamping on bugs.
63. Write a story on what your life would be like if you had a life.
64. Go into your local shop and wait by the counter. When they ask 'How may I help you?' respond 'Yes, I'd like to buy a life, please. I was told you stocked them.'
65. Go into your garden, find a bug and break it's leg.
66. Make a bug hospital.
67. Nurse the bug with the broken leg back to health.
68. Keep a slug as a pet.
69. Keep it for months on end.
70. Call it Frankie.
71. After months of keeping it, have a ceremony to set it free into the wild.
72. Invite your friends to the ceremony.
73. Cry at the ceremony.
74. When asked why you had to let Frankie go, sniff and say 'I don't wanna talk about it.' or 'We eventually grew apart. Frankie was too old to be living with his Momma now'
75. Go through one of your mother's "Womens Own" magazines and find a picture of a really fat woman (These are ALWAYS in Womens Own)
76. Tear the picture out, frame it and put it on your wall.
77. When questioned, say 'That's my target. I wanna be just like her.'
78. To prove this, always ask for second helpings.
79. When you go to a restaurant, at the end of your meal, ask for a doggy bag.
80. Purposely leave the doggy bag on the table when you leave.
81. Laugh at anything.
82. Make sure it's a wheezy laugh.
83. When asked what you're laughing at, choke and say 'THE GROUND!!' and point at something obviously not funny.
84. Dial for a pizza, and when they ask for your address, tell them to mind their own business and hang up.
85. Order pizza's to a house across the road. This way, you can enjoy the pleasure of watching people who don't want the pizza try and explain without getting into trouble.
86. Make sure you withold your number first!
87. Dial for a taxi and when asked your address, say "10 Downing Street, London"
88. When they say 'Very funny' reply 'Is that any way to speak to the Primeminister of Great Britain?!!' and slam the phone down, angrily.
89. Walk into stuff.
90. Throw rocks at passers by.
91. When questioned on this, throw your hands up and yell 'Oh, that's right! BLAME ME!! Everyone else does!! Just because it's me!!', burst into tears and run home.
92. Tell all of your friends that there is a concert on at your local whatever. Make sure it's a band everyone loves (like Good Charlotte!!) and tell them your dad can get you all tickets, free of charge.
93. When they question you, weeks later, on the tickets, say 'What concert?'
94. Slowly get your memory back and say 'Well, you didn't pay, so my dad didn't buy them.'
95. Make fun of the retarded kids at school, then tell the teachers they were bullying you.
96. Throw rocks at old people.
97. Throw food in the road and watch it get run over (We do this... ALOT)
98. Go up to a random stranger on the street. Tell them you've lost your twin and ask them if they'd mind filling their place until you found them.
99. Go up to the same stranger later on in the day and say 'My boyfriend/girlfriend dumped me,' begin to cry, scream 'HOLD ME!!' and throw your arms around them.
100. Do a tap dance
101. Write a list of things to cure your boredom!!
by: intoxicated-dreams.org
~ Lucinda aka LuLu 
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