June 1st - June 19th
It's almost summer! The last few weeks of school have come, and students will need to study hard for their final exams! Don't let up yet, or your grades won't be what you want them to. Of course, the weather is almost perfect and pristine, in attempts to lure students away from their studies.
Continued from The Deep End. First paragraph is to finish off the last thread, and then on to the next morning!
IC:
Harry wasn't quite sure how Ginny would react to him kissing her. He hadn't really thought about it until once he was there, but even while he was kissing her, Harry's mind was too blurred to think of anything. But if he had had time to think, he would have been deathly afraid of what would happen. After all, by kissing Ginny, Harry was basically smashing that methaphorical wall to pieces, without worrying where those pieces flew off to. For all he knew, Ginny could have been pondering leaving at that very moment and really didn't want him to kiss her. In that case, things could have gotten very bad. She could have shoved him away and slapped him across the face and stormed out, and that would definitely be the end of everything. But, to Harry's surprise and utter pleasure, that wasn't the kiss. Soon enough, he felt Ginny returning the kiss and for once, everything seemed so right. Everything was perfect. Nothing could ruin the moment.
"I guess I could stay for a little..." she trailed off, still feeling woozy inside. "Or a little more than a little...if that's okay."
Harry's eyes were moving under his eyelids. He began shifting a little and eventually, a small smile passed across his face. He was feeling extremely happy for some reason, though he couldn't exactly recall what. But Harry didn't want to ruin the moment by trying to remember what exactly was making him so happy. So instead he half opened his eyes, smiled again, and buried his face into the head of redhair next to his eyes. Harry's eyes suddenly snapped open. Red hair? He was fully awake now, eyes wide as he look around and looked at what he was doing. He was in his bed, sheets up to his shoulders, one arm folded against his chest and his other gently resting over Ginny's body. Merlin. This wasn't what he'd had in mind when he'd invited Ginny in the past morning. Harry wasn't upset at what had happened, not by a long shot, but at the moment he was just too shocked to really comprehend what happened and soon found himself fumbling around trying to get out of the bed without disturbing Ginny, because Merlin knew this whole situation would become even more awkward if she awoke.
In the end, Harry ended up falling out of his bed and landing with a thump on the floor. Luckily, he'd been smart and gotten it carpetted, so it didn't hurt as much as it could have. Of course, even if his arm had been removed at that point, Harry doubted he would have noticed. Instead he shuffled around, trying to find his clothes and quickly pulling them on. But he paused for a moment as he couldn't seem to locate his shirt. He glanced around again, then looked at Ginny. Harry quickly turned away though, not really wanting to think about her at the moment. He was a bit too embarrassed to and needed something to do. But what could he do? Harry thought about it, and soon came up with the conclusion that he should take a shower and immediatly moved toward his closet and grabbed a change of clothing.
But just as he was about to head toward the shower, Harry remembered that well, his bathroom was connected to his bedroom and that wouldn't do. All the noise would no doubt wake Ginny up and he wasn't sure if either of them were ready for that confrontation yet. But luckily, the house had two bathrooms -- on upstairs and one downstairs. The downstairs bathroom only had a shower and didn't have a tub like the upstairs bathroom, but frankly, it wasn't as if Harry ever used the tub anyway. It was just there for in case he ever felt like using it or maybe if someone else wanted to use it. As soon as the thought of 'someone else' passed through his mind, Harry started thinking about Ginny and that immediately got him distressed again. As much as having Ginny live in his house or coming over frequently would have been great, at the moment, Harry didn't want to have to ponder the possible complications that could come along with them.
But as Harry headed toward the door, he paused for a moment, thinking about Ginny. Since this was his house, he had a change of clothing, but for Ginny... well, it wasn't as though she had expected to spend the night. He was fairly certain she wouldn't have a change of clothing and while Harry really didn't have any female clothing lying around the house, he supposed he could at least put something out for her. And so, after a bit of rummaging around, he found a decently small shirt (with a Chudley Cannons logo on it, of course) and a pair of his smaller pairs of flannel pajama bottoms. He wasn't sure how well they'd fit Ginny, but Harry had always been a relatively skinny person, so he was sure they wouldn't be overly large on her, at least.
After folding the articles of clothing and leaving it at the foot of the bed, Harry quickly and quietly snuck out of the room and began to head downstairs. As he was decending his stairs, he spied his missing shirt precariously hanging onto the railing of the stairs. Harry felt the blood rush to his face and he quickly grabbed the shirt and ran the rest of the way down the stairs and to the bathroom. He threw his old clothing into the corner and jumped into the shower, hoping to sort everything out while he was in there. But nothing seemed to help and Harry just found it easier not to think about it. Of course, that proved to be quite difficult as well, for as awkward and uncomfortable as Harry felt, he would be lying if he said he didn't enjoy what had happened.
Stepping out of the shower, Harry quickly dried himself off with a towel and slipped into his chance of clothing. Hair still damp, Harry simply draped the towel over his head and headed toward the kitchen. Almost subconciously, he looked in his fridge to see what he had lying around. A lot of times, he just ate whatever left overs he had from whenever, but this morning Harry supposed he could do something nice and took out the unopened package of bacon and some eggs. While he wasn't the best at cooking, Harry was quite good at making breakfast due to all that he'd had to do while living with the Dursleys. And so, with the determination to focus on something other than what had happened the night before, Harry began to cook some bacon and scrambled eggs.
Mmm... Ginny was having a very good dream. She wasn't alone anymore. No, in fact she had slept in someone elses bed that night, and was waking up next to someone else. She hadn't felt that way in a long time. Too long. Which was why it was so cruel for her brain to give her dreams like that. Rolling over in bed, she felt that there was no one next to her, and it confirmed that it had been simply that. A dream. But something still didn't feel right. It didn't feel like her bed at Hogwarts. The blankets had a different feel to them...softer. Flickering her brown eyes open, she took in a foreign bedroom, not hers at Hogwarts without a doubt. No. This was Harry's bedroom. It hadn't been a dream. She was in Harry's bed. Her stomach lurched, and for a second she thought she was going to be completely sick.
"What did you do?" She whispered to herself. Memories from the previous day, and night, came flooding back. She had followed him from Hogwarts back to his home, he had invited her in, they had started to talk. Then they started to argue, he had begged her to stay, she refused, he kissed her, and then she stayed. She was only supposed to stay for a bit. But now here she was, waking up in Harry's bed. She hadn't spoken to him in ten years, and the course of events when she sees him is small talk, fight, kiss, and then wake up in his bed the next morning.
This was not happening.
Ginny buried her head in her pillow, closing her eyes tightly. Maybe if she kept them shut long enough, when she opened them, she would be somewhere else. This wasn't a dream anymore. It was a nightmare. Or was it? What had she thought the day before? That she wanted to make it so he could never love anyone else? How selfish was she? She could hardly stand herself at the moment. She was a sleazy, selfish, promiscuous little slut! It was redundant, yes, but it expressed her feelings perfectly at the moment.
But where was Harry? Had he run away forever and for always? Ginny opened her eyes again and looked around the bedroom. It was completely empty. Just as it had been the previous night before... No. No, no, no. Stop thinking about that for a moment. The only thing different was that there was a pile of folded clothes at the foot of the bed. Had Harry picked out clothes for Ginny to wear? She wasn't the opposed to slipping into her clothes from the previous day, but maybe that meant he wanted her to stick around for a bit longer. She would have to wear her clothes away from his house, but maybe just to lounge around... Did he want her to stay, or was he freaking out about what had happened as well? "And you were thinking about regret..." Ginny mumbled to herself miserably as she sat up in the bed, keeping the sheets tight to her skin just in case Harry walked in right then. Not that it would make a difference now.
Sitting there for a few moments, Ginny thought about the previous night. As ridiculous as it was, she couldn't say that she hadn't enjoyed it. Far from that, in fact. She felt more alive than she had in what seemed like decades. And to think, if things continued... No. Harry was probably downstairs, pacing back and forth wondering just how he was going to kick her out of the house and make sure that she never came back again. Again, what if he just wanted that fix? That little fling to cure the pangs of lonliness? Ginny had hardly made it difficult for him. He had to argue with her for a bit, but the minute he kissed her, she basically sold her soul to him. Oh Merlin she had so many issues that she needed to discuss with a psycho therapist. Unfortunately, she couldn't afford therapy on her salary...
Crawling out of bed, Ginny slipped into the clothes Harry had placed out for her. With an intake of breath, she realized the shirt had the distinct smell of Harry...a pleasant smell. It made Ginny smile despite all of her confusion at the moment. What was she going to do? Pretend that it wasn't a complete mistake? Was it a mistake? It was a good mistake...a fun mistake. Oh man, it was a good mistake.
Okay, she was going to pretend that it wasn't a mistake. Even if it was, she could live in her own little reality for a little bit, right? Harry was downstairs; she could hear him in the kitchen. So what now? Taking a deep breath, she would sacrifice her dignity. Again, those thoughts of wanting him to love no one but her for the rest of his life came back to mind... She wanted him and only him, so she could play off of it, right?
Right.
She padded down the stairs barefoot, and entered his kitchen quietly. Hopefully he wasn't too jumpy or anything. She had to admit, however, that he looked extremely cute over there, cooking breakfast. An act that she had never imagined him capable of. Especially because of the state of his little bachelor's cottage. "Smells good," she said gently, making sure to not make such an abrupt appearance that he would jump right out of his skin. She then made the daring move to close the gap in between the two of them and smile at Harry before raising up onto her toes to plant a kiss on his cheek. "Need any help?" she asked, injecting cheer into her voice. Oh Merlin, please let him not think that it was a mistake...
Re: Empty Space [ ISO: Ginny ; 2/8/09 ]
Strangely enough, the cooking seemed to calm Harry down a bit. He hadn't really cooked anything in a while, seeing as he hadn't really been motivated to do anything in a while, but now that he was standing in front of the stove, two frying pans going, he felt relaxed. Harry was able to somewhat clear his mind as he layed the pieces of bacon out on one of the frying pans and cracked some eggs into a bowl afterwards. He shredded some cheese and mixed that into the bowl as well before setting it aside. That was what Harry liked about cooking -- it was so methodical and everything had to be done at the right time. If he started cooking the eggs and the bacon at the same time, the eggs would be done much sooner, and that wouldn't do. So one had to wait until the bacon was almost done before putting the eggs into the frying pan. It was just the sort of thing Harry needed to stop thinking about everything, Ginny, the situation, everything. He needed to calm himself before she woke up, and this was the way.
Well, unless she happened to sneak out of his bedroom window. But Harry was sure that she wouldn't do that. Or at least, he hoped she wouldn't do that. If she did, well, their next meeting would be infinitely more awkward than it already would be.
But as he stood there, cooking breakfast, Harry couldn't help but smile a bit. There he was, making breakfast for the person he loved. It almost seemed like something out of a movie and it felt so right. It felt like they should be doing this every weekend and while that thought sort of scared Harry, he couldn't deny that he loved Ginny. If he didn't love Ginny, last night wouldn't have happened. Ginny's worries of him needing a casual fling to move on with his life weren't real and the reality was, Harry loved Ginny. He loved her and he wanted to be there whenever she woke up. He wanted to be able to sneak out of the bedroom and cook breakfast for her when he wasn't working, and Ginny would wake up the smell of bacon. Sure, it was a bit of a fantasy, but Harry couldn't help but think about it. Maybe Ginny could even get rid of his curtains and by some that actually matched. Then again, Harry didn't really mind the curtains, but he supposed his cottage could use a bit of touching up.
The sound of sizzling bacon filled his ears and Harry didn't notice the sound of footsteps coming down the stairs. It didn't really help that his towel was still draped over his head, thus covering his ears. But it was probably a good thing that Harry didn't hear her, because if he did, he probably would have freaked out and that wouldn't have been so good. This way, he didn't have time to think about what he was going to say and how awkward he felt and he would have to just go on impulse. And that was exactly what Harry did.
"Smells good," Ginny's voice said, and Harry fought not to flinch. It was safe to say he was surprised, but he didn't want to make it seem as though he didn't want to hear Ginny's voice, because as awkward as things were, her voice was probably the only thing he wanted to hear at that moment. And that feeling mirrored in the smile he gave her as she smiled at him. But what surprised Harry even more was when Ginny took a bold step forward and gave him a light kiss on the cheek. Now all they needed were some little kids running around the breakfast table and the perfect scene would be set. Well, maybe not. Harry wasn't quite ready to think about kids and well, they were missing the whole thing about actually being married and living in the same house, first.
"Need any help?"
Harry nodded, waiting for his voice to come back. "Er... Yeah. The plates are in the cupboard right over there--" he pointed, "--and the forks are in that drawer." He pointed again. "And you'll find some glasses next to the plates if you want something to drink. There's stuff in the fridge. Unless you want coffee," Harry said with a slight grin. Coffee was like, fuel power for adults nowadays. "There should be some already brewing." He glanced over, and sure enough, the coffee-maker was already making coffee. While Harry tried to use as little amount as magic possible, he couldn't help but magick his coffee-maker to start up as soon as he woke up. He often didn't have time to make his own coffee and he really didn't like the instant stuff, so it hadn't really been much of a choice. And it wasn't as if anyone ever stayed the night to actually see his coffee-maker at work. Well, at least not until today.
Harry took the bacon off the stove and quickly cooked the eggs before shoveling both of them onto a larger dish. He then proceeded to stick two pieces of toast in the toaster. "So... er... Sleep well?" Harry asked tentatively. It was the polite thing to ask, but well... awkward.
Re: Empty Space [ ISO: Ginny ; 2/8/09 ]
Harry nodded in response to Ginny's offer to help, and she could tell he was a little bit startled to see her. Maybe she had snuck up on him a bit. Either that or he felt exceedingly awkward around her. But why should he? It hadn't been a mistake. As long as she kept telling herself that, she would be alright. She could survive. So what if reality came crashing down on her in the future, making her realize she had made one of the biggest mistakes of her life? She needed to focus on that moment or else she would lose it all and turn into a blubbering, blathering idiot. And when that happened, she had a tendency to say stupid things that she really didn't mean. So it was for both her benefit and Harry's that she kept her cool, and maintained her composure. The good thing was that a large part of her believed that she hadn't made a mistake. How could it be when it felt so right?
"Er... Yeah. The plates are in the cupboard right over there--" He pointed, and Ginny followed his directions, pulling two plates out of the cabinet. "--and the forks are in that drawer." Again, she followed his orders. "And you'll find some glasses next to the plates if you want something to drink. There's stuff in the fridge. Unless you want coffee," Ah yes, coffee would definitely do the trick. Ginny was steadily becoming more and more addicted to it. Perhaps that would be a reason for her to pick, say, maybe orange juice instead. But then if she sacrificed her morning caffeine fix, she would be in a terrible mood for the rest of the day. And why would she ever want to do something like that to herself? "There should be some already brewing."
Ginny took note of that and got herself a mug, watching as the coffee maker slowly filled the coffee pot up. Once it was full enough, she pulled it out and quickly poured herself a cup, replacing it so it would fill up more. As she did this, Harry finished up cooking the bacon and eggs, and piled them onto the plates that Ginny had taken down. Oh Merlin...how could it look so attractive for a man to be doing something as simple as cooking? Maybe it was because she hadn't seen him in so long. Would his appeal burn out the more she saw him? Please don't say it would come to that. She would do anything. How much would she be seeing him? Every weekend? More than that? She still had her job to worry about and had to take care of grading, talking to the few students that actually cared about her class... How much she would love to just run away from it all.
"So... er... Sleep well?" Harry asked tentatively. Ginny couldn't help but smile and laugh in response. Perhaps it would catch Harry off guard, but really, it was Ginny being Ginny. It was time for her to remember who she was. Who she was would laugh at something like that, because they both knew what happened the night before. Even if it was a mistake, they couldn't deny it. They couldn't turn back time and make sure the events didn't lead to such a thing. And besides, if she was acting like it wasn't a mistake, she needed to be up-front and confident about it. So pretend, be blunt, be...confident.
Flashing Harry a dazzling grin, she replied, "Of course I did." Apparently that wasn't enough, so she continued. "Your bed is extremely comfortable by the way." She couldn't help but think that the awkward expression upon his face was adorable. Feeling her hormones flash again, Ginny couldn't stop herself. He was so close to her, there was no ground to cover, and he just looked so...cute. Before she could stop herself, she had closed the gap between her and Harry, and went on tiptoe once again to kiss him, bringing her hands around to the back of his head to pull him toward her. Who said they couldn't start out the day right?
Re: Empty Space [ ISO: Ginny ; 2/8/09 ]
It was a bit odd to have someone help him set up breakfast. Well, it was a bit odd having someone over for breakfast in the first place, but once Harry got over the initial awkwardness, he supposed it was kind of nice. He’d been feeling so lonely lately, and while he knew it was partially due to his own tendency to distance himself from people, it was nice to have someone to share the morning with, especially when that person was Ginny. It almost reminded him of those mornings at the Burrow, waking up and being able to walk downstairs to find a big breakfast and all of his friends sitting at the table, chatting and laughing. Even though the Burrow was a bit small, it was one of the warmest places Harry had ever been in and he loved it there. It was almost sad to think about how long it had been since he’d been there -- it’d probably been as long as he’d been away from Hogwarts. After Harry had moved away from the Dursleys and began living on his own, he had no need for a second home. He was lacking the family that the Weasleys provided, but Harry sort of decided it had been time to move on.
It wasn’t surprising that Ginny went for the coffee as soon as it had been offered, and Harry found himself smiling in spite of himself. It seemed everyone needed their caffeine fix in the morning, and Ginny was no different. Harry himself had to have a least a cup of coffee a day to keep him going, especially on those nights where he didn’t get as much sleep, whether it be because he simply couldn’t sleep, or because he was up all night working. If he’d had some coffee during his years at Hogwarts, school might have been a bit easier as well. He would have actually been able to stay awake those days when he’d spent the entire night before either trying to finish off his homework or doing something sneaky. Academics had almost been secondary in the life of young Harry Potter, having to always deal with some sort of disturbance and, of course, having to fulfill a prophecy and defeat one of the most evil wizards in the entire Wizarding World.
But now that was gone and all Harry found himself worrying about was the woman who was pouring herself some coffee behind him. He, unlike her, was not at all worried about whether her appeal would run out. Ginny had always been beautiful to him and he knew that would never change. Harry wasn’t the kind of boy who was shallow and had a short-attention span. After all, he’d loved Ginny for this long, hadn’t he? Ginny had always been in his thoughts and he knew that she was the one who would make his life whole again. If not her, then no one else. While there were some people who, in their lifetime, fell in and out of love, Harry was never like that. He was always genuine and passionate and with him, it was like he fell in love once, and that was it. There would be no one else. Harry was completely enamored with Ginny and he doubted that would ever change, fights or no. He’d tried to convince himself once that he didn’t love Ginny, but he’d only been fooling himself and it had been apparent when Ginny had showed up on his doorstep yesterday. And he liked to think that she loved him too, and that was the reason she had been on his doorstep in the first place. He liked to think that they could work things out and they could get back on track. Maybe they wouldn’t be able to exactly pick up where they started, but they could pick up somewhere, couldn’t they?
"Of course I did," Ginny said with a smile in a laugh, throwing Harry a bit off guard. She made him feel as though he were the only one feeling awkward, though he was sure this was just another Ginny trick. "Your bed is extremely comfortable by the way."
Harry gave Ginny a sheepish grin, and put his hand to his head to run his fingers through his hair. His fingers though, touched towel and Harry quickly removed it from his head, tossing it onto the back of one of the chairs. He’d sort of forgotten it was there. “Well, glad you think so. I had to buy it knew since the mattress it came with was complete rubbish. I could feel every spring in my back.” While Ginny managed to sound completely natural and calm, Harry was never all that talented at hiding when he was feeling awkward. So despite the fact his words were casual enough, there was still something in his voice that hinted he wasn’t completely comfortable.
But that sense of discomfort soon vanished as Ginny closed the gap between them, bringing her lips to his. Harry instinctively leaned down so Ginny wouldn’t have to stand on her toes and soon found himself kissing her back. One hand gently wrapped around her waist, while the other reached out to drop the spatula he was holding into the sink. As soon as that was down, his fingers gently touched one of Ginny’s elbows, lightly tracing her arm until his hand came to rest on her back. Merlin, now this was a good start to the day. But Harry didn’t want anything to get too carried away. He was already getting the urge to unzip his jeans and so, gingerly pulled away from Ginny. He smiled at her, resting his forehead gently against hers. “Let’s eat before breakfast gets cold.”
Re: Empty Space [ ISO: Ginny ; 2/8/09 ]“Well, glad you think so. I had to buy it knew since the mattress it came with was complete rubbish. I could feel every spring in my back,” Harry replied about his bed, making Ginny laugh.
"I don't know, Harry. Maybe you just didn't...break it in enough," she replied with a suggestive smirk upon her face. He really was adorable whether he tried to be or not. Irresistible...just as he always was. And it wasn't in a physical way before. Not that Harry was ugly, but he was, well, awkward. Not that Ginny could talk. But he was skinny and gangly with jet black hair and knobby knees... But the way they all were put together, they were so Harry. It just worked.
After Ginny's "attack" so to say, Harry gently pulled himself away, making Ginny want to go positively crazy. How could he just pull away when she was going hormonally crazy? He wasn't asexual (they had established that the night before) so why wasn't he responding? She had basically thrown herself at him right there in the kitchen. Maybe she was being too easy, to available. Maybe it disgusted him, and he was sitting there thinking about how she was a cheap, easy floozy.
Once his hand trailed down from her arm to her back, however, Ginny knew that he was responding. Maybe he was trying to express someting they called self control. Now why would he want to do that? He was the man, wasn't he? Weren't the women the ones that were supposed to monitor that? Well here Ginny was, with him and ready to go. But now he was playing the "We can't do this now" type of thing, pulling away. Maybe she was over analyzing everything. Maybe he was going to suggest that they move upstairs to his bedroom. She really hadn't given him a chance to speak before her mind ran off at a million miles per hour, condemning him for not wanting her right then and there. But really, such a thing was a touchy subject. That's why so many people in the world were afraid to be forward and upfront. They could possibly be forced to face rejection. Which was the worst feeling of all, wasn't it?
“Let’s eat before breakfast gets cold.” Oh Merlin. Ginny wanted to roll her eyes, but instead just laughed, leaning in to kiss Harry once again. When she pulled away she looked up at him, shaking her head slightly.
"If you try to use self control all the time, you're never gonna get laid again," She told him. "Besides..." she trailed off, kissing his lips, then his neck for a few moments. "Who cares about breakfast? You can always heat it up later..." With that sentiment out of the way, Ginny began to tug at his shirt, making an attempt to pull it off of him. He might try and protest, but she knew he was a male. He could only resist her for so long before she would drive him positivley crazy. Well, hopefully. That was the plan at least. It had worked a couple times in the past. Not that Ginny WAS a cheap, easy floozy, but she had had her fun in the past. Particularly after her fight with Harry. Apparently she felt getting "love" was the only way to cure the ache of missing him. It hadn't worked, of course, but Ginny would never share that minute detail with anyone. No one needed to know about her past. Why should they even care?
Re: Empty Space [ ISO: Ginny ; 2/8/09 ]
Harry did his best to remain somewhat cool and calm, but in reality, he was still feeling quite awkward. After all, he'd just slept with the girl... woman he'd been pining for for the past ten years. While most people probably would have been celebrating or something to that extent, Harry just felt... weird. He'd known Ginny ever since he'd started Hogswarts and for a while she'd just been Ron's little sister to him. Maybe that's what made it a little weird -- it wasn't as if just because Harry loved her that she was no longer Ron's little sister, because she was. No matter what happened, Ginny would always be Harry's best friend's little sister and well, for all of the things Ron didn't really pay attention to, he was rather protective of Ginny. Harry remembered the look on Ron's face whe Ginny and Harry had first kissed and well, now it was more than just a kiss. While he knew Ginny wouldn't give a damn what her older brother (or two... or six) thougt, Harry wasn't exactly fine and dandy with going up to any of the six Weasley brothers and announcing, "Hey! I just shagged your little sister." Yeah... It didn't really sound right.
But of course, it wasn't as though Ginny was making it any easier. While Harry was just trying to maintain a collected state, she seemed to be trying to seduce him, or something to that extent. "I don't know, Harry. Maybe you just didn't...break it in enough," she said, making the young man flush slightly. Well, he hadn't really expected that. Ginny had always been somewhat playful, especially while they were dating, but that wasn't the kind of comment he expected from her. But Harry should have expected Ginny to change over the years as both she and her teasing matured. Harry, on the other hand, had sort of mellowed out and well, his romantic life hadn't really done anything for him.
Even as Harry tried to cool the situation down a bit, Ginny was pressing forward. And while Harry wouldn't have minded a repeat of the other night, he wasn't quite sure how to react either. Usually, the young man had no problem ignoring women who were trying to catch his attention, but none of those women had been Ginny. Ginny just had that thing about her that made Harry's green eyes watch her and it wasn't just that he thought her so beautiful. It was just everything about her and the fact he loved her with every fiber of his being. Harry had been waiting for this moment for ten years, but now he was there he was panicking a little. While Harry didn't mind a physical relationship, he didn't want to just charge into everything, ignoring everything else. He knew that wasn't Ginny's intention, but after isolating himself from the world for so long, the sudden intimate shows of affection from Ginny were almost smothering.
"If you try to use self control all the time, you're never gonna get laid again," She told him after laughing and kissing him again. Harry was feeling the blood rush to his face again. Merlin, he really wasn't good when it came to stuff like this. "Besides..." Ginny kissed his lips again, but before Harry could decide whether to kiss her back or not, her lips moved to his neck, getting a sharp intake of breath from Harry. Goosebumps ran down his arms and the hair on the back of his neck stood on end asHarry's mind went blank for a moment. All he could register was the feeling of Ginny's lips against the sensitive skin of his neck. "Who cares about breakfast? You can always heat it up later..."
Harry wanted to point out that they could probably heat their breakfast with all the heat they were creating right then and there, but he couldn't quite get himself to say anything. In fact, his mind was a big haze until he felt Ginny tugging at his shirt. But his mind was still somewhat glazed over and he slid his arms out from the sleeves of his shirt, but before the two of them could pull the shirt over his head, Harry leaned forward to kiss Ginny, hands moving to her hips as he slid them underneath the shirt she was wearing, running a hand against her stomach. Instinctively, he steered them toward the table until he felt them hit the edge at which point he went to lift Ginny up so she would be sitting on the table. But as Harry kissed Ginny, the haze began to clear and Harry found himself hesitating again. "Wait..." he said. "Wait... What are we doing?" he asked, though it was more of a rhetorical question than anything. As much as he was enjoying the moment, Harry couldn't help but feel as though they were moving much too quickly. But then again, wasn't this what he wanted? The two of them were getting another chance, and they were taking advantage of it.
After a moment, Harry just shook his head and said, "Nevermind." He moved to kiss Ginny again, telling himself that he should just take Ginny's advice and go with it.
Re: Empty Space [ ISO: Ginny ; 2/8/09 ]
Harry didn't seem to want to give in to Ginny, but she could see it happening. He was giving in. Slowly but surely, he was letting her take control. And that's what she had intended to happen. The male sex drive had a tendency to drive a man to all lengths of insanity. They literally lost their minds, and they lost all control of what they were doing. Which let Ginny come in, and control his every impulse, his every thought, his every desire. That was the power of being a women. They were masters of seduction, whether men wanted to admit it or not. Men gave in much easier to physical and visual stimulus than women did. This of course was subject to interpretation, and varied from female to female, but for the most part, Ginny's theory was steadfast and true. It seemed to be working right then, so she was comforted by that fact.
Harry finally started reacting, reaching his hands up her shirt to touch her stomach, making butterflies soar through her stomach at his touch. He steered her back toward the table, lifting her up so she was sitting on the table. Well, that was it. She had won. Right then, right there, on the kitchen counter. But for a moment, something seemed a bit off with Harry, something that Ginny couldn't figure out. Why was he acting this way? Why wasn't he just going along with it? That's what had happened the night before, wasn't it? There was no second guessing, they had just gone straight into everything. It was like the domino effect. They started one thing and suddenly it just lead to another, and another, and there Ginny was, waking up in his bed the next morning. Where was the indecision coming from now? Why now? Why not the night before, before they had gotten started into everything, possibly making the worst mistake of their lives?
"Wait..." he said. "Wait... What are we doing?" Harry asked. Merlin, this was incredible.
"We're kissing, Harry," Ginny replied with a teasing laugh. But something about his question bothered her. He was having second thoughts. He couldn't make up his mind about what he wanted to do, meaning Ginny had manipulated him. She had diverted him from his initial path by means of seduction. That wasn't right. It was far from it for that matter. Did that make her a bad person? Maybe not a bad person, but mean and cruel? How could she take advantage of him like that?
"Nevermind," Harry said, leaning forward to kiss Ginny again. She kissed him back, but cut it off short, gently pushing Harry back a bit. She couldn't go through with this, not if Harry was going to be acting like that. Not if he was going to be obviously second guessing every single motion and action. Intimate relationships didn't work like that. Ginny couldn't work like that.
"Maybe we should just eat breakfast," Ginny suggested, looking up at Harry in almost a sad, forlorn manner. "I'm not going to force you into doing something that you're going to regret." With that, Ginny wriggled out from between Harry and the table, taking a plate of food and sitting down at the other end of the table, making her way back to the counter once again, but only to get her coffee. She sat down and looked back at Harry, at a loss for what to say. "I... I just don't understand," she started, "why you're so hesitant now when you weren't...before." That was the best way to put it, without making it exceedingly awkward. Well, that's what Ginny thought. "I mean...should I have not stayed last night?" She asked, looking hopelessly at Harry, the boy she had been in love with since she was a teenager, looking for some sort of hope or some sort of guidance. Some sort of assurance that she hadn't made a mistake or used poor judgement.
Oh Merlin, this was going to get so painfully complicated.
"The thing about growing up with Fred and George is that you sort of start thinking anything's possible if you've got enough nerve."
Re: Empty Space [ ISO: Ginny ; 2/8/09 ]
Harry never was quite sure why he always acted differently than other people did. He’d thought that he’d get back into the groove of things once the war had ended, but once it did, he suddenly realized that there was no going back for him. There was no normalcy for Harry Potter. His normalcy was the prophecy, the war, and now that was done, it was like he had nothing else. And because of that feeling, Harry had grown up a bit awkwardly. He’d matured so much in such a small amount of time that he felt the same now that he was physically older. Perhaps that had a hand in his sexual impulses. While he had them like any other person, Harry always seemed to be less affected by them than most men. While he was a teenager, he’d gone through that awkward stage of wanting to find romance, and after that desire left him after his seventh year, it was like he just sort of stopped. Even during school, it wasn’t as though Harry had had a lot of time to think about girls as much as other boys his age had. He’d spent a lot of his time trying to figure out how not to get kill and how, instead, to kill the most evil wizard in the world. It was almost as though he’d spent so much time thinking about other things, now he had the time, he just wasn’t thinking about girls and romance, aside from when he was thinking about Ginny.
With Ginny, everything was different, as he had proven the night before. Ginny just drove him mad and it was like he was rendered completely useless against her. Or so he thought. But now that he’d let himself get carried away once, Harry was being more cautious. He didn’t quite understand himself why he was being so wary, but he couldn’t help it. He had turned himself into a hermit and now it felt like he was trying to drag someone into his life. And it was Ginny he was trying to drag back. Ginny Weasley, the love of his life. As corny s it sounded, it was true and Harry accepted that fact. But he also knew that Ginny represented to him all that he’d been trying to escape from. When he looked at her, he saw Hogwarts and all the people he’d met and all the things he’d done. It was like the night before, Harry had pushed those thoughts away, but now that they’d slowed down, he was finally start to see things and becoming suddenly panicked. Did he really know what he was getting himself into? Was he having second thoughts?
Ginny seemed to notice the conflicts that were going on in Harry’s mind, for she soon pushed him away. "Maybe we should just eat breakfast," she told him, looking at him with an expression that was painful for Harry to see. He felt like he was always ruining things for them. He felt like he was the party-pooper and he could never just let things be. Harry sometimes wondered if he’d just been a normal boy, would his life have been better? Everyone always told him that things worked out for the best and he’d turned out okay in the end, but really… was he? He felt like he was one of those old war veterans who could never really escape from their pasts. It was like no matter what he did, the thoughts of the war were with him, always hampering what he wanted to do. It had stopped him from being an auror, it had stopped him from having much of a social life, and now it was stopping him from being with Ginny. He wished he could just pretend like nothing ever happened and act like he wasn’t the Boy Who Lived. He wanted to just be Harry Potter, normal, everyday boy, trying to live his life and get the girl he loves.
"I... I just don't understand," Ginny started after wriggling herself out between the table and Harry. She had brought her plate and her coffee mug to the table, but Harry didn’t feel like moving. He simply slipped his arms through his shirtsleeves again and pulled it over his head. "why you're so hesitant now when you weren't...before." Harry wished he could ask himself the same question. Why? Why did he always have to do this? "I mean...should I have not stayed last night?"
Harry shook his head. “It’s not that, Ginny. I’m glad you spent the night. I don’t regret what happened. Truthfully, I’ve never felt more alive since you came,” he started, trying to get his words out right. So far, he supposed, it was good. He was telling the truth. While it may have been awkward to discuss, Harry was glad Ginny had spent the night. He’d felt like he’d been a ghost floating along for so long, just a zombie marching through his usual routines. Then Ginny came along and reminded him that he could actually feel. That he was still a human being and that he could experience things and that he didn’t have to be alone forever. “It’s me. It’s always me. I pushed you away ten years ago and I’m doing it again. I have to keep reminding myself that I’m not destined to be alone, but…” Harry looked at her, feeling hopeless. He felt as though he was sitting on a raft and watching Ginny as the waves pulled him farther and farther out to sea. “I don’t know who I am anymore. I don’t know what I’m supposed to do. I don’t know if I’m that same boy who kissed you ten years ago.” Harry looked down at his feet before glancing up again. What if he wasn’t that same person Ginny loved before? What if he’d changed too much? What if she no longer loved him? “I don’t want to hurt you, Ginny.”Edited by: A Lions Heart at: 3/14/06 11:13 pm
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