Demonboy
Unregistered User
(7/16/02 9:42 pm) Reply
Welcome
All this virginal white space...All this unposted upon message board...I noticed Kealan doesn't have a bio, so I will take it upon myself to write one:
Kealan-Patrick Burke was found wrapped in plastic in a dumpster in the back parking lot of a Wal-Mart in Burkettsville, KY. The homeless woman who found him couldn't decide whether to name him "Kealan" or "Patrick," so she named him both. "Burke" was the name of the head doctor at the asylum from which she was released two years prior. It seemed to fit. You could say "Kealan-Patrick Burke" was born that day, but it was later discovered that he was actually born in a Government testing facility three days before so hideously deformed that the Cross-Species Cloning Project was relieved of its funding. But miracles do happen and K-P grew into a bright, inquisitive child -- despite the tentacles. An avid reader, he became well-versed in the literature of his day -- supermarket flyers, and religious hand-outs. His love for the written word was matched only by his intense hatred for all things made of plastic. If anyone was born to write, it was Kealan -- again, the tentacles. His work has appeared in numerous publications, but he won't tell anyone where.
Plastic Free Zone
Welcome aboard Kealan! And thanks for that wonderfully insightful biography Kurt. All this time I thought Kealan was Irish and turns out he's really a dumpster mutant!
And don't worry K-Pax The Dark Room is a Plastic Free Zone, but there is plenty of LYCRA! I know how much you love LYRCA! Muwahahahaha!
Registered User
Posts: 21
(7/17/02 10:44 am) Reply
Re: Plastic Free Zone
Congrats to the winner of the flash fiction contest! Good story. I love shorts and microfiction and flash. There needs to be more of it in our genre, dammit.
-- Mike A.
Harry Shannon
Unregistered User
(7/17/02 10:54 am) Reply
Irish Maniacs
Really great to have a place to post all the filthy limericks and ghastly folk tales which revolve around the esteemed Mssr. Burke and his leprechaun minions. I will keep said board firmly in feeble mind. Congratulations on all your recent successes, Kealan. Well deserved!
Transplanted Irishman Makes Good
Look, Kealan now has a bio up! No more speculating on his mysterious upbringing. (Although I still think Kurt's on to something with that dumpster mutant theory. But, now that I think about it, "Kealan" sounds a lot like the type of names those one eyed aliens from The Simpsons had. Something to think about.)
Re: Transplanted Irishman Makes Good
Special K oh my I FOUND YOU my dear... how's K doing these days? WOW nice to find you here now I will read what this is all about, but I couldn't contain myself when I saw YOU dancing around at GORELETS...
Re: Transplanted Irishman Makes Good
I always wondered how you got your name Special K... now I know. WOW, and how nice of the demented soul that found you and took you in. *warm fuzzies*
You know I always believed your bio was:
A sweet baby boy was found abandoned upon a NASA spacecraft. NASA decided to take him to space, run tests, and evaluate human testings on him. They found this baby so SPECIAL they named him SPECIAL K for Kealan and after Burke on "Aliens" the movie because they found he digested the crew and brought them back to earth in their cryotubes- in raw form of humanoid mutant drool.
Then I saw his dreamy picture and realized it had all be a hoax...
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