June 1st - June 19th
It's almost summer! The last few weeks of school have come, and students will need to study hard for their final exams! Don't let up yet, or your grades won't be what you want them to. Of course, the weather is almost perfect and pristine, in attempts to lure students away from their studies.
desperation sinks in (OPEN 3/31...near the end of dinner)
ooc: so I'm really bored and have been wanting to write something really bad. Sorry this isn't my best post but I was bored and itching to post something, anything and I have been wanting to write this for a while now...so enjoy!
It was a place that Sean usually spent only a couple of minutes in, he did not like to linger in the owerly. He knew this was a place that his younger sister went to seek out solitude and it appeared that today Sean was taking a leaf out of her book for once. However, he most certainly had not planned on remaining in the owerly for longer than a couple of minutes today but then again nothing seemed to be going how he had planned them lately.
You would hardly recognize the Hufflepuff Prefect. His hair was slightly tussled and his school robes were hanging open, revealing Sean's muggle clothing underneath; tan shorts and a navy blue polo on top. He was probabley growing dirtier by the moment as he sat on the unclean owerly floor, his legs were drawn up to his chest while his head rested on them. His arms were drawn hanging lazily over his knees, a crinkled piece of parchment held in his right hand.
His world seemed to be crashing about him for weeks now with and there was nothing he could do about it, no matter how hard he tried. First Lynn had broken up with Sean, in results to that his grades started to suffer and now of course another chunk of his world was telling him goodbye in the form of a letter from Lynn.
She was gone. She had left him. How could he not of known what was going on? But then again she had said that only her friends knew and that she told them not to tell any one. That hit hard, 'her friends'. Sean was know longer friends with Lynn and that just cut deep. He wished he could of said goodbye in person. It's amazing how something like someone leaving could make everything that happened between the two vanish...or at least that was how Sean felt.
Sean was first suspicious when he was finishing his classes for the day. He knew Lynn's schedule quite well, having picked her up and taken her to classes when they were dating. But he hadn't seen her on the familiar paths that she took to her classes. Then rumours started circling about her strange disapearance from classes. Finally word reached Sean's ear but he dared not believe it. He wouldn't allow himself to.
The arrival of a certain letter from his owl confirmed however what he dared not think about. It was as though he had been hit in the head with a bludger and in the stomach with a curse when he read the contents of the letter. There was a sickening feeling there that he had not felt since he realized that he and Lynn were over.
Sean had one class to go but had someone tell the professor he felt sick. He then locked himself up in his dormitory for several hours until the common room started to become crowded with those preparing for dinner. Not wanting to cause a great scene (like he hadn't already) he had joined his peers at dinner. But he couldn't take for long in the crowded Great Hall. He kept glancing at Lynn's empty seat with her friends, and not to mention that his friends and several other students kept sending shady glances his way.
Finally he stood up and went back to the dormitory. He wrote a letter to Lynn, it seemed that he was writing alot of those lately. When he had broken up with Lynn he had written several letters that he never intended to actually send to the girl. Now he wrote another one. He filled this one with apology after apology but in the end telling Lynn that he respected her decision.
Then, with robes undone he headed for the owerly and this is where he is found now. Sean knew he wouldn't send the letter, it wasn't any different then the others but still there was comforting feeling with writing his feeling out and getting them off his chest. But there was something worse about this sitation and all the rest he had endured with Lynn. Not dating Lynn and not talking with Lynn was awful but not being able to see her every day...that was far worse.
Sean needed some sense knocked into him. He wanted someone to tell him what to do. Usually Sean was the one dishing out all the answers but he was at a loss right now. He felt that if Mack had approached him he would even talk to her. He was starting to feel desperate and he hated that feeling.
Re: desperation sinks in (OPEN 3/31...near the end of dinner
It was evenings like these that Tammi wished she was back in bed. She wasn’t feeling quite herself, and she had to finish a few things before she made her way to bed. On the top of her list of things to do was send a package of letters – one for her father, one for her brother, one for her sister, and one for her mother. Her mother…
It had been over six years since she’d seen her mother or Christopher, but there was something deep inside her that said she was missing something big. So, in that case, she needed to make some sort of contact to make sure that everything was alright. It had hurt her to write such a kindhearted letter to the people who treated her badly beyond disbelief. Of course, she was concerned that her little sister wasn’t alright, but the only way she was going to find that out was the first major step in her planned change for her personality.
The one step she needed to take was to visit them.
Granted, she didn’t want to see any part of her family that she hadn’t come to terms with, but if she was going to change for the better, she was going to have to fix the things that made her change for the worse. If that meant that she had to spend a week talking things over with her mother and Christopher, then she would do her best to stay a little more civil than someone else would be in the same situation. Hell, she might even bring a friend with her for moral support.
Tammi took the frst steps up the stairs to the owlery, glancing down every few seconds to make sure that she wasn’t dreaming. She wasn’t too sure that she wanted all these letters delivered. Her sister and she had been conversing back and forth over owl for the last month or so, and she felt great about it. She’d have to make sure that she met up with her sister again that summer as well.
Who knew what the key to everything getting fixed was?
She drew a sigh before entering the owlery – if she was going to turn back, it was before she entered the room. Did she seriously want to contact her mother? Memories from the eleven years in her house filled every nightmare since she left there - the beatings, the alcohol, the tears, everything. Who even said that her mother rememered her? She knew that she hadn’t noticed when she left, but maybe a week or two later her mother realized she was gone. There was only one way to figure out.
With one final glance at the package, she stepped into the owlery, her eyes flickering up to the rafters, lined in owls. It was times like these she wished she had her own owl. The droppings from all of them were disgusting. Glancing down at the floor, she stepped around the huge heaps, settling next to the large pole in the center, then glancing up again. She let out a shrill whistle, and a barn owl flew down and settled on her shoulder. She smiled weakly, and pet the owl gently on the head.
”Hey there. Follow the path on this letter, please? It’s in London.” she said softly, tying the letter to the owl.
An affirming squack sent the owl off her shoulder and out the window, and she gaze followed it, also catching the presence of Sean in the corner of her eye. When had he gotten here? Had she just missed him? Moving over to where he stood, she smiled weakly.
Re: desperation sinks in (OPEN 3/31...near the end of dinner
Sean didn't know who all knew about Lynn leaving. Of course her friends knew and obviously there were rumors flying around but then again rumors didn't mean anything. Life at Hogwarts would often grow dull and so stories were bound to be fabricated and hence rumors would begin. Sean doubted that anyone would really believe Lynn leaving unless they took notice of her absence in classes.
It was so hard to believe that the girl was gone. Sean cared for her so so much, more than anyone knew and he blew it. He had tried to make sense of everything but just couldn't and he had no one to talk to about. He just barely told his parents about the break up. They were shocked of course but offered words of comfort to their son. Mack of course was no help and was only negative about the whole thing.
What Sean really needed to do was talk to Tammi. She was, after all, one of his best friends. He could talk to the girl about anything and he hadn't really gotten the chance to talk to her about Lynn...when they were dating and when they weren't dating.
Although he had problems of his own it wasn't hard for Sean to notice that recently Tammi seemed anxious about something. He hoped that she was doing all right. When he was dating Lynn he knew he wasn't making time for Tammi and felt extremely guilty for that.
But as Sean moped about the owlery it seemed that his wish was about to be answered. As he was still focused on his loss he barely noticed that Tammi had walked into the owerly, letters in hand. When he did notice her she had an owl on her shouldar and was giving the bird directions to a certain location. He just stared at her, not saying anything.
Tammi glanced over at Sean as she just noticed him. She gave him a smile that was too hard for him to return. ”Hey. I’m sorry I didn’t see yo- What’s wrong? If Sean weren't so depressed he'd laugh. He would laugh because it was just like Tammi to notice something was wrong. But he would also laugh because he knew how pathetic he looked now and how obvious it was that something was wrong.
For a moment the seventh year didn't say anything, he just stared at his friend. He was at a loss for words. What was wrong? How could be put it? Apparently Tammi didn't know that Lynn had left or else she would of known why there was something wrong with him.
"Lynn's gone. She left." He croaked out, just barely. "She's gone." He said again, looking quite miserable. He looked down and shook his head. "Why did she have to go?" His voice was a hoarse whisper. If he knew looked as pathetic as he sounded he probably would of been even more depressed than he already was.
Re: desperation sinks in (OPEN 3/31...near the end of dinner
From the second that she saw Sean standing in the Owlery, she knew something was wrong with him. After all, he hadn’t been one to linger there before, even when his sister never had a problem with it. Heck, Tammi wouldn’t have a problem with it if it wasn’t for the smell. She was almost tempted to talk to the caretaker and suggest cleaning the Owlery for detention punishment. It sounded like a great idea at the time, but she wouldn’t want to be the person to do the job.
Her mind drifted off the Owlery, and back to Sean. There was something wrong, and she couldn’t tell what it was. Sure, it could be an effect of the rumors drifting around school that Lynn was gone, but where would she go? And wouldn’t she wanted to have stayed with Sean? Of course, she was probably the only one in the school who didn’t know about Sean and Lynn’s breakup, but every story had to have something hidden from the main character.
Plus, Tammi needed to talk to Sean about things that had gone on recently. She hadn’t spoken to him since the beginning of the month, and she had spilled everything to him about Tucker, school, family, just everything. However, what had happened in the last two weeks had been more than Tammi even believed herself. All the things with Alex, not to mention her sudden courage to send messages to her family, everything had happened almost.
But as Tammi watched Sean strain a smile back at her, she knew that now was the moment to push away everything that she needed to talk about with him to be a friend, a friend who would give him the advice and the guidance that he needed. All she needed right now was to make up for the last month that she hadn’t spent with him to show him that she really did care. Time to stop being selfish.
"Lynn's gone. She left. She's gone."
The words he spoke hit her like a brick wall. Lynn was gone? As in, they broke up, or she actually left? Maybe, sometimes, in this school, rumors weren’t always just rumors. But if she left, did that mean that they were broken up as well? Tammi didn’t think that Lynn would leave the school willingly without saying something to Sean if they were going out still – and if she had said something to Sean, he wouldn’t have just started looking awful now.
And the worst thing about it was that she suddenly found herself speechless, not even able to speak to give a word of disbelief or advice. She, herself, hadn’t even believed that Lynn was gone.
"Why did she have to go?"
A small pounding started in Tammi’s heart – pity. God, she couldn’t even guess how much pain his heart was going through right now. By this time, she’d assumed that they broke up, and now his heart was breaking for a second time. It was like making a wound, letting it heal for a day, then cutting it open again. There was no way that she could even imagine what that felt like.
The only thing that she could think of at that current time was to comfort him. Not caring about the piles of owl droppings at her feet, she crossed the rest of the distance between the two of them and wrapped her arms around him in a gentle, yet comforting hug. There were no words at the top of her head that she thought would be good to be spoken at the moment, so she spoke no words.
Letting her thought wheel turn for a few moments, a thought came across her head that seemed like blasphemy at first, but as she thought about it longer, it seemed like something that she needed to bring up. He was overreacting. But how would she break it to him without hurting his feelings? Pulling away from him slightly, looking into his eyes, she gave him a reassuring smile.
”It’ll be alright, Sean – there are other fish in the sea. You’ll get over Lynn just as you’d get over any other girl, I promise. Right now, I don’t mean to sound harsh, but you need to get over it – school is ending here in a couple months and you’re graduating – do you really want to be all depressed on your last day at this school? Lynn pushed you away because she was scared, possibly, or just because she didn’t want to be with you – there’s someone out there who will treat you better than she ever did. Trust me on this, you’ll forget about Lynn within the next few months. It won’t be that hard.”
As the words came out of her mouth, the only thing she could hope was that she wasn’t being too harsh on him.
{ooc: haha there are times like these that i wish that tammi was a slytherin... it would have been a whole lot easier to put some sense into him if she wasnt so concerned with being harsh.}
Re: desperation sinks in (OPEN 3/31...near the end of dinner
Some people reacted to events like this in different ways. Some just want to be alone. They hide out in their rooms by themselves and isolate themselves from their friends. Some just bounce right back and act as though nothing happened. Sean was usually one of those types of people. Nothing seemed to really ruin Sean's day. He hated being upset and he hated moping about. Moping made him feel like he was asking for attention.
But to him this was a different situation. The girl he loved had moved away. She had up and packed and left. Maybe she wouldn't of gone if it weren't for the break up but he was sure that that wasn't part of why she left. Lynn was such a free spirit and would never let Sean "get in her way" of leaving if it was needed. He just wished it wouldn't hurt so much.
As soon as Tammi wrapped him into a hug he knew that was what he needed. No matter what anyone said he knew it was important not to shun his friends out of his life no matter how hurt he was feeling. Tammi could only help him get through this, there was no possible way that she could make him feel worse. Sean wrapped his arms around Tammi in return, feeling some of the sadness drift away at the simple gesture.
Tammi soon pulled away from Sean and looked him in the eyes. Sean tried his best to look into her's in return. He wanted her to know that he was listening to her and valued everything she had to say to him.
”It’ll be alright, Sean – there are other fish in the sea. You’ll get over Lynn just as you’d get over any other girl, I promise. These were definantly words of comfort for Sean. He knew there were other girls in the world besides Lynn. He knew he would eventually get over her although that was a hard concept to think of at the moment. But he definantly felt that Lynn wasn't just another girl but he knew what Tammi was saying would turn out true in the end.
"-Right now, I don’t mean to sound harsh, but you need to get over it – school is ending here in a couple months and you’re graduating – do you really want to be all depressed on your last day at this school?"
This last part struck Sean hard. School would be ending soon, very soon. Did he really want to be depressed the rest of his time? Tammi was completely right. There were other girls out there but you only have one seventh year at Hogwarts.
"Lynn pushed you away because she was scared, possibly, or just because she didn’t want to be with you – there’s someone out there who will treat you better than she ever did. Trust me on this, you’ll forget about Lynn within the next few months. It won’t be that hard.”
Why were girls so good at this? They seemed to know exactly what to say in any given situation. Tammi didn't even know what had happened between him and Lynn but she definantly was right on target. He knew Lynn was scared and that was were everthing went wrong between them.
Sean looked down for a moment and a small smile, if you could even call it that, appeared on his face. The Hufflepuff sighed and looked back up at his friend.
"You're right. You always are. Lynn isn't the only girl out there and I have no right to claim her." Sean cleared his throat before pressing on. "As much as it hurts letting her go I know I'll have to do it sometime, right?" Sean cracked a small smile that almost vanished instantly.
He turned to look out the window as though he were hoping Lynn would just appear on the school grounds. "She was very important to me. I cared about her so much." Sean wasn't one for drama but this definanltly was a dramatic turn of events for him.
"But," Sean turned and looked at Tammi, a hopeful type of look on his face. "I can't rely on her for my sole happiness, can I? That's just not a smart thing to do. I mean, if you were to base your sole happiness on one thing and then that thing left, where would you be left?" Exactly where I am right now, Sean couldn't help but think.
"I've been selfish these past weeks. Even when I was dating Lynn." Sean knew that he had pushed people away when he was dating Lynn and when he broke up with her. There other people out there with problems far worse then his. "Thanks, Tammi. You always know what to say." Sean brought his friend into a hug just as she had done moments before to him.
"Now that you have knocked some sense into me is there anything that I need to know that's going on with you. You, know, since I haven't really been around that much lately." Sean felt sheepish now. He felt like a horrible friend to Tammi. It was embaressing for him, after all his friends and family always came first in his life.
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